I keep saying it.  It is almost a mantra.  I have enough saved. I have enough to retire.  I am trying to convince myself that I am there.  

How do I know and why is it hard to accept?

I read bloggers, listen to FIRE podcast, read profile articles and case studies on soon to be retirees with their numbers published.   Without thinking about myself I look at their numbers and go – oh yeah they have enough, likely have worked more than they needed.  That it is obvious to the readers including myself that profile case have enough to retire

I give it all of 30 seconds of thought.  They are set.  They should be retired. Why are they still working?

 But they are not me.  It is easy to judge from a distance.  I don’t put myself into their shoes.  I don’t realize they are struggling the same way I do with the decision of when to call it. I use no emotion when judging their position.  All logic. Just math.  It is so obvious.  

It’s different when it’s you.

When I look at my case the emotion turn on and the first thing I think of are all the bad things that can happen and all the bills that are coming. I call them the “Yeah buts”.  

For you old schoolers if you say it fast enough ,in the right whiny, panicky, scared tone of voice you get the Abbott and Costello (AbbOTT!!!!) sounding in your head. Saturday morning entertainment at its best .

“Yeah but” my kids are still in high school and the big bills for the Jedi Academy are coming which I will pay for.  

“Yeah but” the kids have not decided on a career path – school is a minimum of 4 years and could be 8

“Yeah but” house prices are insane and I will need to help my kids. How do I do that?

“Yeah but” inflation is high and everything I buy is getting more and more pricey

“Yeah but” there is a new kitchen in my future

“Yeah but” Padme needs a new Landspeeder in the next few years.

“Yeah but” we spent more money than I thought last year.  We don’t really pay attention to a budget 

“Yeah but” I want to start travelling.  Often. Every year

“Yeah but” the not so little Jedis are just entering the braces stage for the next 2 years

“Yeah but” the Starship (boat) needs fixing

“Yeah but”…..

It is an endless loop in my brain on what is coming up. The focus on the dollars going out. The scared side. Fear.  The Dark Side.   You know the drill because it happens to many soon to be retirees 

So how do I know I have enough.  Well I need to start filling out the other side of “Yeah But”.  The ”Because”.  And it needs to be a mantra that I repeat so the fear goes away.  I need to set a date and mentally prepare for when.  I need to remind myself what is on the other side.  The next Chapter in life.  The Light Side 

So how do I know I have enough

“Because” we have are fortunate to have no debt 

 “Because” part of the nest egg is a work pension, partially indexed to inflation. It will pay part of our bills. Forever.  In 2 years Padme could retire and get this pension immediately

“Because” the rest of the nest egg only needs a conservative return to fund the rest of the retirement

“Because” Padme is still working for at least 2 years because she wants to which will increase the Nest Egg

“Because” there is some inheritance someday that hopefully will be insignificant but may not be 

“Because” I am working  at a new Death Star for 1 to 2 years to add more to the pile

“Because” we have smart kids. They are good with money and will likely have good careers

The logic / Light side knows I am there.  But the emotion / Dark side is hard to overcome.  I need to talk about it.  I need to convince myself.  Maybe it is deeper than just money.  Maybe there are some deep emotional scars that keep me focussed on it or some other retirement fear that I am struggling with subconsciously.

Those I hope to bring into the light and to start a plan. To systematically address each one.  To fight back. 

 I do know the path of least resistance is easy to take and one I typically go down.  I feel I have been doing that for years so it’s hard to remember how to adopt a new path.

To live differently.  The new Chapter.

I think it begins with setting a date combined with a number that is the last goal. With no more goal posts moving. Easy to say tough to do

One year of saving will get me to the goal posts in June of next year.  So that is the date.

When the kids are out of school next year I am retired.  Not 2 years – 1.  I keep saying that I will work the 2^nd year if I am having fun.  Fun at work is not the same as fun in life. 

 1 year. Not 2.  Repeat.  1 year.  1 year